New Perspective

Hi y'all,

I'm breaking out of the usual "average [insert]" template to talk about something deeper. I started this blog to talk about how much I'm trying not to be average. I realized now, during my second year at UCLA, that it is okay to be who I am. I am John Tran. I am defining myself, and only me. Not all the other John Trans in this world. I am an individual. I am freaking Vietnamese. My mother's from 'Nam. I respect her. I just wrote an 8-page essay about my mother. She's a refugee. I feel so bad for complaining about how hard my classes are, and how stressed out I am about my future. But why? My mother was worried about whether or not she'd ever be free. I should be thankful that I even get this opportunity to be where I am. You may be asking, why am I rambling? I just drank right now. Yes, I admit it. I used to be scared admitting it, caring about what other people think about. I just went out with my friends. When I drink, I think about life, which I am too scared to think about when I'm sober. I am as determined as anyone else.I don't fall under any category or clique. I am hard-working as hell. Believe it. I take pride in my 5'5" stature. I have as much testosterone as a body-builder taking steroids. One day, when my buttons are pushed, I will go ape-shit on you. You don't want to see that. I HATE letting people down. I am eager to please. I don't hang out with only Asian people. After hanging out with ONLY Asian people my first 17 years of life, I realized that I've been living in a bubble. I've met so many people, but yet, I've only met a handle of the people out there. I've met Koreans, Ethiopians, Pakistanis, Italians, whites, Africans, Hmong, ALL types of people. Here at UCLA, I've learned so much from these people. Even though I feel at peace hanging out with my kind, I realized that I can learn so much more breaking out of my shell and talking to all these different types of people. Not everyone has the same perspective as me. I need to understand. Why do I want to be a doctor? I don't know. I'm trying to find out myself. Honestly, I do want to help people. Don't think I'm in this for the money. Don't be surprised if I go to Africa/Honduras/Panama and volunteer and help out those who are actually in NEED of help. But then again, I am quite tipsy. I'll probably think what I just wrote is stupid. I know I don't make sense right now. It's okay. I don't expect anyone to read this. I'm doing this for myself. As John Tran, I will not be average. I will not be amazed, I will be amazing.

Sincerely,
John